Dr Wayne Dyer

Dr Wayne Dyer – The Shift

My last blog spoke about letting go of outcomes. Hear what Dr Wayne Dyer has to say about this.

Dr Wayne Dyer is an internationally renowned author and speaker in the fields of self-development and spiritual growth. He passed on in August 2015 and I became more aware of his work as a result. His version of positive change is known as ‘The Shift’, the title of both a book and a film. He sees our lives as a Spiritual journey, with the first half of our life being the ‘morning’ and the second as the ‘afternoon’. He states ‘..what held true in the morning of our life becomes a lie by the afternoon.’ He calls the move from ‘morning’ to ‘afternoon’ – ‘The Shift’.

In the ‘morning’ of our lives, we are taught from a very early age by our parents and society. There is an emphasis on achievement and accumulation, and it is our egos who drive what we do. However, the ego is a ‘false’ self and not who we really are. Our ego tells us:

  • Who we are is what we have, we have to have more and more, and compare it to what others have. If things go wrong and what we have goes away, we go away – what’s left?
  • We are what we do, what we achieve. Our success and value depends on this and we have to compete to be the best.
  • We are what others think of us, we have to be someone different every time someone wants something from us. We often put aside the part inside that wants to be us, to be what others want us to be.

When we begin that shift, we move away from a life following our ego (life of ambition and achievement, a place of anxiety, fear, guilt and anger) to a life of meaning, where our focus is on serving and giving back. We begin to trust who we are within and let go of our ego. This shift is often triggered by an event or a low point, but equally it can just slowly evolve, when we are open to letting it happen. The definition of success changes, abundance and prosperity are good, but we detach from the outcome and let go of the fear of not having. We feel freer and more open to listening to our inner voice, and we may be surprised by the synchronicity; notice how things happen and direct you on a different path. Trust in the direction it takes you.

Dr Dyer said that women for example ‘shift’ as follows:

‘Morning’ – value family (nurturing), sense of independence, career, fitting in with others

‘Afternoon’ – value own sense of personal growth, sense of self-worth/self-esteem, spirituality, happiness, forgiveness

When we live in meaning, we live these virtues:

  • Reverance for all life (respect)
  • Sincerity (more than just honesty)
  • Gentleness (kindness)
  • Supportiveness – service without expecting to receive, it will always come back to you anyway n many different ways

So a life of meaning is about being soft, flexible, open, not always being in control but letting go of the outcome and just allowing it to happen. Ask – ‘how may I serve?’.

Remember – you are only a thought away from changing your life!

All information taken from the film/book ‘The Shift’ by Dr Wayne Dyer.

Expressing Freedom

Thinking About Making Your Positive Change?

Are you stuck in a rut, feeling trapped by unsettled emotions or wanting to find better balance in your life? You are not alone, many people have these feelings, yet accept that ‘that’s the way it is’ or ‘it’s just me’, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

Being aware that something needs to change is the first step. Wanting to make that change is the second step, but where do you go next? If you keep on doing what you’ve always done, you’ll get the same results, so if the results you’ve been getting don’t work for you – TRY SOMETHING NEW!

For real, positive change to take place, often the programs that have been running in the subconscious part of our brain need to be re-written, generating new beliefs and behaviours. The right kind of hypnotherapy (use of hypnosis in psychotherapy) can play an important role in helping you to make your positive change and transform your life. Hypnotherapy helps you to begin to relax and change your focus, and gain a greater sense of awareness of what’s going on for you. This awareness opens your mind to other possibilities and so the seeds of change are sown…..

What is hypnosis?

Whatever you have seen on the television about stage hypnosis – people clucking like chickens – is nothing like hypnosis used in therapy. It is not a ‘miracle cure’ that is done to you, in therapeutic hypnosis you remain in control at all times. We all naturally enter states of hypnosis quite frequently, we just don’t think of it as being hypnosis. Daydreaming is an example, also driving your car and then suddenly wondering where the last 10 minutes went, because you can’t remember. With hypnotherapy, you will be guided into a state of deep relaxation, you remain aware of what’s going and in control. It is this relaxed state that makes communication directly with the subconscious possible and therefore, provides the means to re-write any programs that are no longer working for you, so that positive change can happen. It is completely safe and everything discussed during a therapy session is completely confidential.

Finding a good therapist

So, you’ve made the decision that you’re ready to make your own positive change, what’s the next step? Knowing someone who has already made positive changes in their life and contacting their therapist is always a great way forward. For positive change to happen you need to feel comfortable with your therapist, so check out their website, talk to them on the phone – do they inspire you and make you believe that you can make these changes?
What therapies do they use, is it just hypnosis or do they use a range of supporting therapies to suit your particular needs? Do they take an holistic approach – working with mind, body and soul? What qualifications do they have and are they registered with their professional body, such as the General Hypnotherapy Standards Council (GHSC)? Being a member of a professional body means that the therapist is governed by that body’s Code of Ethics and you can expect them to behave in a professional and ethical way at all times. Are they a member of the Complementary and Natural Healthcare Council (CNHC), set up with government support to protect the public by providing a UK voluntary register of complementary therapists? CNHC’s register has been approved as an Accredited Register by the Professional Standards Authority for Health and Social Care.

These are all things to consider and there are many good therapists out there, so take your time to choose the right one for you. Making positive changes is about starting your own therapeutic journey, a journey of discovery – treat it like an adventure! Your therapist will ‘walk’ with you and be your guide, as you find your way to success.

WWMC Logo

Weight Management without Willpower

My last blog spoke about why New Year Resolutions don’t always work and how to do it differently. This blog uses weight management as an example of how to do it differently for SUCCESS!

Timing – During this planning phase of January/early February, start thinking about your eating habits and what needs to change; is it what you eat, portion control, emotional eating, drinking too much? What are your triggers for unhealthy eating/overeating? Really begin to understand what’s going on for you and seek help to explore it at a deeper level if you need to. Start keeping a food/drink diary to help you.

Self-belief – You’ve tried diets before but have not sustained any reduction in weight. The expectation of yourself is that the same will happen again, so the voice of your ego is already telling you that you’re going to fail. This is not a diet…. this is a lifestyle change, you’re doing things differently, and of course you will get a different outcome, one that you can sustain because you’ve planned for SUCCESS. Positive affirmations such as ‘I only eat healthy food’, ‘I am in control’, said many times throughout the day will keep any negative ego thoughts out of the way. Choose your own affirmations before you start and use them again and again and again.

Being ready to let go – Are you ready to let go of the old overweight you? Is the ‘new you’ someone you used to be or someone completely new? Think about what being overweight is doing for you; what have been the perceived ‘benefits’? If you believe there have been ‘benefits’, now is the time to take a closer look, question those beliefs and let them go. Start to focus on the real benefits of being healthier and slimmer, and getting to know this ‘new you’. Letting go of what was and getting out of your comfort zone, so that you can enjoy what is to be, is the most liberating thing you can do for yourself. Picture the future and the changes you are making – focus on your eating habits/lifestyle and your weight will take care of itself.

Planning – Start to plan your meals (and healthy snacks if required), so that food choice becomes automated on a daily basis (taking out the need for willpower) and only shop for those meals. Choose healthy foods in their natural state and prepare meals from scratch. Eat the rainbow with fruit and vegetables. Plan your portion size with a smaller plate; half your plate should be vegetables/salad, quarter carbs and quarter protein – everything in moderation.
Eating out can be planned for too. Look at the menu in advance and decide what you’re going to eat, so you’re not making that decision on an empty stomach on the day.

Using the information under ‘Timing’, do you need to plan any other changes to manage the triggers and/or the emotional eating? Do you need new activities/hobbies in your life to replace overeating? What about exercise?

Support – Choose who you want ‘in your corner’, get them on board, be clear what you want from them and use that support. Make them part of your emergency action plan. Is there anyone who is likely to try and sabotage what you are doing? Putting it bluntly – DITCH THEM! They have their own agenda and don’t have your best interests at heart. Surround yourself with those people who only want what’s best for you.

Willpower – With all the above in place, you’re ready to go! Great planning ‘trumps’ willpower every time. Also remember HALT – never make food choices when you are Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired.
Above all else, learn from any ‘mistakes’ when you wobble and NEVER give up. Believe in yourself and carry on. NO BEATING YOURSELF UP!

So…. when you’ve done all the above and feel ready, start to make the changes that will lead to your SUCCESS!!!!

If you need support to get started, call me on 07906 091022